Three Secret Reasons Men Eventually Leave ‘Good’ Women
Category:
Relationship Matters
Relational, did you constantly make the decisions in the relationship? Where to eat, what fun things to do, or what movies to attend?
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Understanding these issues can help you get over a bad breakup … or, possibly
help you get your ex back.
Here are the three secret reasons men break up with
really great women:
1. He felt pressured and inadequate
Were you constantly chasing him? Did you want more love, affection, or s*x
than what he was doling out? Did you feel like you were frequently trying to
“fix” things in the relationship?
If you can identify with any of these, there was definitely an imbalance in
your relationship, and more than likely he felt pressured and inadequate in
your presence. And it’s important that you know … that’s not at all your
fault.
Most men run from emotional pressure like they’re running for their lives
(because, in their minds, they are running for their lives). Emotional
pressure challenges the underdeveloped part of a man’s masculinity and makes
him feel ill-equipped to deal. In his mind, he feels like anything he does
isn’t (and never will be) good enough for you. This causes men to naturally
shut down and lock their hearts up like Fort Knox, rather than deal with any
more feelings of pressure or inadequacy.
2. Your relationship felt competitive
If a man has to compete with a woman for control of the relationship, he not
only feels inadequate, but also like there’s no place for his masculinity in
his woman’s life.
Keep this in mind: it’s very important.
This isn’t to say that a man should control the entire relationship, that’s
unfair to both parties. Rather, a successful relationship has complementary
forces where each person relinquishes control in certain areas. If this
doesn’t happen, both parties end up in competition — both compete to win and,
in the end, the relationship loses. This dynamic shows up in scenarios like
these:
In a social context with friends! Did the two of you get in arguments about who was “right” in front of friends?
In a social context with friends! Did the two of you get in arguments about who was “right” in front of friends?
Financially, who is the breadwinner? Did you make more money than him? And
more importantly, was it ever brought up in a way that emasculated him?
Relational, did you constantly make the decisions in the relationship? Where to eat, what fun things to do, or what movies to attend?
If he felt like you were against him instead of for him, he never felt fully
capable of opening his heart because he was afraid of losing the “game” and
getting hurt.
3. He didn’t feel respected
A man can’t build a life with a woman who doesn’t respect him. He has to feel
that his partner has his back above and beyond anyone else — he must know that
in his weakest moment, she will shower him with acceptance. Because, you see,
here is the hidden truth about your value: you are the key to his greatness.
In order for him to unlock all that he has within him, including his
tenderness and willingness to commit, he needs a deep and underlying
foundation of respect.
With a high caliber woman by his side he can take greater risks in life and
actually experience more freedom than ever possible by himself.
So now that you know the reasons why he left, how do you start to get him
back? It’s time to reflect and begin to take immediate action to rectify the
situation if you still truly love him. Once you know how to breakthrough his
defenses and touch the deepest part of his heart, he’ll feel an overwhelming
calm and trust that you truly (finally) get him.
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